As she became more awake, the memories faded as if they were a dream. Looking at Cat she thought about waking her, however when she saw that the other woman was wearing a headset and had a player in her lap she decided against it. Instead she got out of the bed on the other side. Carrying the still playing CD, Natasha went to the bathroom to answer the call of nature. She was finishing up when Cat appeared at the door and looked at her with worry.
“How are you feeling?” Cat asked coming fully into the bathroom.
Natasha turned off the CD player and pulled the ear buds out. Instead of answering she asked, “What happened?”
Cat crouched down beside Natasha and felt her forehead before answering, “You had a fit again.”
“Again?”
“Let’s get you back into the bed,” Cat replied as she guided Natasha back into the bedroom.
“No Catharine.” Natasha said stopping in the middle of the room. “I want to know what is going on.” She held up a finger, “But first, you need to dress me in my leather.” Sitting at the vanity Natasha felt excitement as Cat hurried to dress her. She thought she was done when the other woman had put on what Natasha had been wearing before. However, she was delighted when Cat pulled a pair of opera length red leather gloves and put them on her. “Good girl,” she said smiling and caressing her own body with her leather covered fingers.
Standing Natasha felt energized, “Now it’s your turn Catharine. Strip!”
“Yes Mam,” Cat replied in a small voice.
Walking over to the dresser, Natasha pulled open the bottom drawer. She was momentary surprised that it opened. As far as she could remember the drawer had been stuck closed and no matter how much she tried in the past, it had not opened. She would have stopped and asked what the heck was going on, however she had something else in mind first. Without looking she knew that there were several items in red and blue leather inside.
However, the two items she wanted were on top. First was a corset in blue leather. Taking it she walked over to Cat and placed it around her waist. Unlike her corset which was smooth and dainty, the blue one was heavy and included straps, buckles and locks. Pulling the stays tight Natasha smiled as Cat whimpered, “Tighter you say?”
“Please…”
“Of course,” Natasha replied and pulled and worked at it until the corset was as tight as she could make it. Next she pulled the straps tight and buckled them. Finally, she put locks behind the buckles so even if Cat wanted to, she would not be able to get out of the tight bondage corset. Walking back to the drawer Natasha reached down and pulled a pair of opera length blue leather bondage mittens out.
Holding them up before Cat she said, “Look ma, no fingers.” Cat’s look of excitement brought a giggle from Natasha’s lips. Pulling the bondage mittens on Cat, she laced them up and then attached straps from one to the other behind Cat’s back so she would not be able to get out on her own. Finally, she attached the ends of the mittens to the bottom rear of the corset.
“Come with me,” Natasha said and led the way out into the living room. She moved the coffee table out of the way before pointing to the floor in front of the couch. “You can kneel there.” She ended up helping Cat get down on the floor. Once the other woman was kneeling, she sat down herself. “Now then, I want to know what is going on Catharine.”
Cat looked up at Natasha and gulped. In a quiet voice she said, “I don’t think I am qualified to answer that.”
“I see,” Natasha said as she stood. She went back to the bedroom and returned a moment later holding a taser. Sitting down she held it up before Cat’s eyes and pushed the button. With an evil crackling sound, a blue spark jumped from one metal tip to the other. Releasing the button, she slid it across Cat’s exposed breast and said, “One more chance Catharine.”
Cat’s eyes were big as she watched the spark. If she could have moved away from the cool metal tips of the taser she would have, “Please don’t ask me…” She closed her eyes in preparation for the shock that she knew was sure to come.
Natasha waited until Cat’s eyes reopened before applying the taser to her own exposed nipple. The force of the shock slammed her into the back of the couch as a scream ripped out through her clinched teeth. Regaining her composure, she lifted it to her other nipple and looked Cat square in the eyes. Not speaking she waited, the next move was up to Cat. As Cat started to shake her head no, Natasha pressed the button. The 2nd time hurt worse than the first did.
Moaning in pain, Natasha picked up the taser and looked at Cat. Though tears were streaming down the woman’s face, she shook her head no. Natasha opened her legs and thrust it against her own exposed lips, “Don’t make me use this.”
“STOP,” Cat yelled. She bent forward and rested her tear streaked face against Natasha’s leg and said in a broken voice, “Stop love, I can’t take this anymore.” She looked up to Natasha and whispered, “I’ll answer anything you want to know, just please stop hurting yourself.”
Natasha looked down at the taser in her hand and thrust it away from herself. What was she doing? “What’s happening to me?” she asked in a scared voice.
“Will you at least take your medicine first?”
Natasha thought about refusing even as she walked over to the kitchen and got the bottle of pills out. “What the hell is Abilify and why am I on it?” she asked loudly from the kitchen. Though she had no intention of taking the pill, she took a glass of water and swallowed one down. It was only after she took it that she realized she had taken the medicine.
Cat hung her head and replied as Natasha came back into the room, “It’s an antipsychotic.”
Natasha sat down as if she had been shot, “You mean I’m psychotic?”
“NO, no… That’s not what I meant,” Cat replied looking up at Natasha. She looked down as she continued, “I’m not the right one to explain, I will screw it up.” She let out a sob, “I always screw it up.”
Natasha’s head jerked from Cat’s words. Sliding off the couch to sit on the floor facing her she raised Cat’s head. “What do you mean, you always screw it up?” she asked as she wiped tears away from her friend’s face.
“Don’t you remember? We’ve gone through this several times before” Cat closed her eyes, “Every time, we reach this point I mess up and the woman I love goes away.”
Natasha felt the world spinning. Before? They had gone through this before? There was an almost memory waiting to be let out. She could feel the darkness coming back to take her back to safety. The memory was something bad, so bad she had to run away again. “Again,” her mind latched onto the word.
Reaching behind her, she found the taser and brought it down hard against her leg. She would not let the blackness take her, not yet. She had to know. As it crackled against her leg, Natasha threw her head back, a scream ripping out of her like a wounded animal. “NO,” her mind screamed as she fought an internal battle, the pain vs the past.
When Natasha could take no more she dropped the taser, in the background she could hear Cat yelling at her to stop. The scent of burnt flesh hung heavy around them. Opening her eyes, she looked at Cat, “I’m still here.” It was only then that she noticed Cat’s look of horror.
Looking down at her leg, Natasha saw two small blackened circles with a wide black line running from one to the other. As she watched, the burnt skin broke apart displaying oozing flesh below. She was surprised that it only hurt a little and said, “That’s going to leave a mark.”
“Let me loose so I can treat it,” Cat said not looking away from the wound.
Natasha shook her head and raised Cat’s face to meet her own, “Not yet. Not until I know everything. What happened to me, what did I do that I can’t face?”
Cat sighed, “What do you remember?”
Natasha thought for a long moment, no matter how she tried the past seemed a blank book to her. “Nothing,” she answered.
“Five years ago, you developed a…” Cat paused searching for the right word, “taste.” She swallowed, “A desire to wear leather, for both of us to wear leather.” Not looking at Natasha she continued, “Not only that, but your taste came to include high heels, bondage, and finally pain.”
When Natasha did not speak Cat added, “I could live with most of your desires, but you wanted me to join in.” Not for the first time she tried to pull her arms free and hold Natasha tightly only to be defeated by her bound arms. Tears started once more as she said, “We fought and fought. It finally came to a head one night and I ran away.”
Natasha felt the memories flood back. They had been fighting over Cat’s not wanting to play bondage games. Cat had left swearing never to return. She chased after her down the street only to lose her when Cat darted across the busy road. It had taken her two blocks to catch up with her and stop her. Instead of telling Cat that she was sorry, Natasha had said, “You’re nothing more than a spoiled brat, an uncaring bitch.”
Natasha’s eyes got big as she stared at Cat, “Oh my god! You’re dead!” She had pushed Cat away from her and into traffic. A screech of tires and horn blast screamed into her ears as she realized what she did. Jumping into traffic she had tried to push Cat to safety when the car hit them. Her voice rose in octave as she backed away from Cat, “I killed you, I killed you!” She felt the blackness fill her as she realized her fetishes had killed the woman she loved.
“No! God don’t leave me, not again,” Cat wailed. She watched helplessly as Natasha’s eyes rolled up in her head. “Natasha, listen to me, I’m not dead, you saved me…” she said sobbing wanting to get free and hold her lover. “Don’t go away, I need you Mistress.”
Natasha felt as if someone had thrown a bucket of ice water on her, “What did you say?”
Cat leaned forward and rested her head against Natasha’s boot, “I need you Mistress.”
Natasha was shocked, Cat’s words of devotion were important somehow, if only she could remember why. Leaning forward she caressed the bound woman’s head as she replied; “Don’t call me Mistress, Cat.” She sighed and then continued, “I tried to take you somewhere that you didn’t want to go to. I was wrong, please forgive me.”
Cat looked up, her eyes puffy and said, “You ARE my mistress.” As Natasha shook her head no, she continued, “Please let me finish,” She rested her head against Natasha’s leg and continued, “While you were in a coma I had plenty of time to soul search. I was scared of what you wanted us to do.” She sobbed once before getting control enough to continue. “I was scared, because of how much I wanted to be tied up.” She looked up to Natasha, “You opened the door to my deepest desires. Desires I kept hidden, forbidden desires, don’t you understand?”
Natasha nodded, “I do love.” She reached down to caress Cat’s face as she looked off into the distance. “You told me them… I was in a dark and safe place and there was your voice.” Looking at Cat she smiled, “I remember. You said that your desire was to be a schoolgirl again, humiliated and punished in public.”
Cat nodded, “Yes, yes mistress. Do you remember anything else I said?”
“You needed a mistress, someone to take care of you. You needed me,” Natasha said in a hushed voice. Her eyes got big as the memory flooded her mind, “You submitted mind, body and soul to me. I can hear your voice, the begging and need plain as day.”
“As I said then I say now.” Cat said kissing Natasha’s boot top. “I submit to you I submit my mind so that you can guide and teach me. I submit my body so that you can make it into the image that pleases you. I submit my soul so that you can care for it and hold it tight for me.”
Natasha nodded, “Yes… those words.”
“When you woke up, you were just like when we met.” Cat said looking up at Natasha. “But, I didn’t want that Natasha. I wanted my mistress back. Every time I tried to bring you to this point you would retreat back into yourself. When you came back, you were the old Natasha again and I would start over.”
“How many, how many times?” Natasha asked sitting back on the couch. All this was new to her and she wanted to know more.
“Seven, this is the eight time.” Cat replied. “I was losing my mind and went to your psychiatrist. It was she who helped me bring you back this time.”
“The woman in red leather!” Natasha said excitedly.
“Yes, she felt that if you saw her in leather, it would help you.” Cat said nodding. “She came up with the idea of using subliminal words in our music to help you remember.”
“Your voice?”
Cat shook her head, “No, it was you that recorded them.”
Natasha looked at Cat as if the other woman had lost her mind. “I recorded?” Her mouth fell open, “But how? I don’t understand.”
“I’m not sure to tell you the truth. Dr. Samson, our doctor, would take you off to the side and have you record the messages. She then would add the messages to music and well, you know the rest.” Cat said looking up at Natasha. After a moment she added, “If you want I can give you her number and let you ask her yourself.”
Natasha was about to ask for the number when a need filled her. The more she wanted to ask about the doctor, the stronger the feelings of lust filled her mind and body, as if someone else was controlling her still. Instead of asking, the words, “No pet, that’s ok,” flowed from her lips.
Feeling her higher brain functions gave away to the burning need she opened her legs and slid to the edge of the couch. Again her voice spoke without her willing it, “I bet after all this time my little schoolgirl, Catharine, is hungry.”
Cat smiled, “Welcome back Mistress, my love,” before lowering her mouth to drink from her mistress’s honey pot.
As she orgasmed, dim part of Natasha wondered who the woman was and what else she did to them.
However, that is another story.
