Dumbass & Amusing news Around the World Daily Roundup 5/4

‘Dumbass & Amusing news Around the World Daily Roundup 5/4 – oh the facepalm for the news today- U.S. Navy is turning to drag performer Harpy Daniels as a ‘digital ambassador(see tiktok video below)

And now for today’s Dumbass & Amusing News from around the world:

OK, who dumped 500 lbs of pasta on the trail (nj.com)

The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of beekeepers only (twitter.com)

Defendant tries the old, “I couldn’t have killed him. He was only shot once. The way I was shooting up that place with my machine gun, I woulda hit hit ’em at least a dozen times if it was me,” defense. No, really, that’s his defense (midhudsonnews.com)

“He has stable housing and has for the past two years.” No one does phrasing any longer (lawandcrime.com)

Oh, barracuda (twitter.com)

Seattle wins the pothole competition this year (king5.com)

Those things can drop stuff on you, it’s true, but they are not usually politically aligned. Bonus: “Ukrainian Saboteur Pigeon” (matzav.com)

UK government plans to give control of their Wikipedia page to the French (theguardian.com

I’m just going to walk in your garage and steal your leaf blower right in front of you. Ohio Supreme Court says it’s not burglary since I didn’t break in (dispatch.com)

Today’s Slatesplanation: What *really* happens in all-guy group chats. Tag is for what apparently doesn’t (slate.com)

The Merriam-Webster word of the day for May 3 is importune, I downloaded the latest Taylor Swift single and importune into my iPhone (merriam-webster.com)

Snake constricts traffic (fauquier.com)

I could get a job to earn the cash buy a laptop. But who likes to work? I’ll just open a fake UPS account, re-route a buyer’s laptop, forge and notarize a pick-up authorization, and fake an ID for myself and the buyer to get a laptop (6abc.com)

Elon Musk threatens to blue “Natural Penis Rejuvenation” corporation (npr.org)

Dentist attacks couple with golf club because they were walking on their neighborhood country club golf course path, fails to play through (clickorlando.com)

The US Forest Service would like your help tracking down a responsible gun owner. This one is responsible for starting a wildfire by repeatedly firing incendiary shotgun shells into dry brush (azfamily.com)

WTFWTTWATL- (cbc.ca)