Dear Salty Vixen, There is this guy that I like. About three weeks ago he got in contact with me. He sent me a text message while he was out of town around 12:30 AM. Well, he texts me every now and then. All my friends tell me to be more aggressive and initiate a conversation, but I freeze up every time I try. When we do text, it’s only small talk, and now he hasn’t talked to me in two days. How can I get his attention without seeming desperate or pushy?
–Not Too Texty
Dear Not Too Texty,
The best relationships are born out of friendships, and small talk is definitely a great first step towards this, so don’t think so negatively about it. However, if your real goal is to have deeper communication with him, you’re probably going to have to initiate it yourself. If you’re feeling nervous about talking to him, you just need to remember to be yourself. For most people, the first few times talking to anyone can be a little nerve-wracking.
Just push yourself to move past that barrier and soon it will feel like second nature. As for what to talk about, begin with typical conversation starters like asking how their day was, if anything new and exciting is going on in their life, etc. Usually there’s enough information in their response for you to begin a deeper conversation. Just remember to stay true to yourself and let the relationship develop naturally as the conversations lead to other things.
XOXO,
