Dear Salty Vixen, I am determined to stay a virgin until I get married, but I am with a guy I truly love and am worried if I can’t satisfy him sexually (without actual sex) he might get frustrated with me. I know guys like getting handjobs…can you give me some tips?"- Ella
Dear Ella and everyone else:
Congratulations on your decision to stay a virgin until you are married Ella. Even though I couldn’t be more opposite with my own beliefs, I respect the fact you want to stick to your guns, yet are realistic and giving enough to know that some type of sexual activity is important within a relationship.
Giving a great handjob is not something that comes naturally to most people, Ella, so don’t fret. Like anything else it takes practice and perseverance. Handjobs done properly can certainly spice up your sex life, so let me help you add this handy little tool into your pleasure-giving arsenal.
I actually learnt my technique from a gay male friend, who considered himself an expert, and it has never failed me. In fact, there have been times when some of my boyfriends have actually preferred my handjobs because of the intense orgasm it delivers. The guy gets a sure fire trip to Ecstasy, and I get the satisfaction of knowing I can deliver the goods, so everyone is a winner.
Great handjobs can be explained in three different phases. Okay, first of all, you both need to be relaxed. My handjob technique requires some concentration on your part, and for your partner to be nice and loose. I suggest the bedroom, with some lovely incense and music to set an atmosphere. Consider it like setting the scene for a massage…make it an important event, build the anticipation and increase the “special” feeling.
So lay him down, naked of course, and position yourself comfortably in between his legs as close to his groin as possible. Depending on your flexibility, health and fitness, you may want to sit cross legged or kneel…however you feel most comfortable.
Have within reach a bottle of baby oil…accept no substitutes; for the best hand jobs, baby oil is the only option. Nothing can generate the same slipperiness and heat as baby oil. So pour a little into your hand, remembering a little will go along way. Rub your hands to spread the oil evenly around, and to warm it up sufficiently so that when you touch his cock he doesn’t jump a mile because of cold hands.
Now stroke the cock, slowly and firmly, until it is champing at the bit and rock hard. Using your dominate hand, grasp the shaft of the cock firmly. The most important thing here is not what grip position you use on the shaft, but rather that you are as comfortable as possible.
This is going to become important when you start to really pump. The hammer grip is generally what works best, although if you have a different preference, then by all means go ahead. So using your dominate hand, which for me is my right hand, start to “jerk” him off, initially straight up and down.
With your other hand, remembering it is also covered in oil, grip his balls and squeeze gently so that the oil spreads thoroughly, making them nice and slippery with your play. Don’t ever squeeze his balls too hard…it must hurt like hell, and can do him permanent damage (especially before they are fully loose), so firm though gentle massaging is enough at this stage.
Alright, so far you are masturbating him with your right hand, and cupping his balls with your other. He should be warming up by now…such direct stimulation on his favourite parts always does the trick. After a few minutes when you feel ready to turn it up a notch, enter Phase Two.
Increase the squeeze between your forefinger and thumb on your wanking hand (tighten the circle those two digits create), but leave the rest of the grip loose. Increase your pace slightly, but make sure you are leaving plenty in reserve. You should immediately feel an increase in friction, and so will he.
Switch the position of your other hand so that you are now pushing the tips of your fingers into the spot between his balls. You can push quite firmly again, but obviously not shove. Small circles in that position will do the trick very nicely. Your guy will now be positively loving your action.
Again, judge how long you think Phase Two should last according to how you are feeling (are your hands getting sore?) and how close to cuming you feel he is. This will take some practice, and don’t worry if you don’t nail it the first few times. Practice makes perfect.
When you make the decision that you have turned for home and are in the final stretch to glory, increase thrusters for Phase Three.
Loosen the grip of your stroking hand and simply increase your pace whilst angling the cock away from you, so that it is pointing more towards his head. This angle puts some strain around the bottom side of his shaft, increasing its sensitivity. You don’t need to bend it, or go crazy with the angle. It is only a slight variation, but believe me, it makes all the difference.
Now in most cases, even this shift in cock position and stroke speed will be enough to make him shoot through the roof. BUT there is something else you can do which will turn up the intensity, but only if you and he are comfortable doing so.
Take your slippery middle finger on your other hand, the one that has been working his balls, and gently slide it inside his ass, palm of your hand facing upwards. You are aiming for the top side of his rear passage about two inches in, because that is where his G-Spot lives. If you can nail that spot, watch out, because he is about to go mucho loco. Only use one finger; the point is not to pump his ass as such, although that can be nice in itself, but rather to really get some attention to Captain G.
With your cock-stroking going as strong and fast as you can manage, and with your other hand and middle finger focusing on his G-Spot, I promise you he won’t last more than minute before you will need to prepare for the money shot. And when he blows, it will register on Richter Scales.
Like I said though, the anal play is optional…I know some women are not quite as nasty as I am, but I guarantee it adds an extra element of “Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”. Happy Handing Ella!!
XOXO,
