I love pumpkins! I love how they look, all orange and round and happy. I love how they taste; delicious pumpkin pie and crunchy roasted pumpkin seeds are the best in October. And, most importantly, I love carving pumpkins. But, as I sliced through the pumpkin flesh and pulled out the gooey insides in preparation for Halloween this year, it occurred to me that there are ways to carve up your pumpkin so that it can love you too.
For one thing, before you hollow out your pumpkin, you could carve a medium size hole into one side of your pumpkin and a small hole on the other. The medium sized hole should be just the right size for you to shove your dick inside and pump your pumpkin. Cover and release the small hole to vary the sensation of suction on the backstroke.
(For best results, trying warming up your pumpkin a little bit.)
Of course, if you’re someone who needs something a little more... substantial to get off, you could always try mounting your favorite dildo into our spheroid orange friend. It’s easy: just lay your pumpkin on its side and trace around the base of your dildo, then draw another circle a few inches wider than your tracing. Cut out a hole, the same diameter as your dildo, in the middle of your big circle. Then cut out the big circle on an inward angle — like when you cut the lid of a jack-o-lantern. Scoop out some of the pumpkin flesh from the underside of your "lid" to make a niche for the base of your dildo so that it sits flush and securely. Fit the "lid" back on the pumpkin, wash everything down, place the dild-pumpkin on your bed or floor, crank the tunes, and ride ‘em cowgirl (or cowboy)!
have a giggle or make it (this is for ADULTs - so don't really try this, this is for comedy)
Pumpkin fucking not your kind of thing? Your house-mates/family/partner would prefer that you carve something that could be put on display? Well, there are other ways to express your pumpkin love.
Who’s to say that you can’t create a lovely pumpkin depicting a blow-job in progress, two lesbians in a 69 or even a simple penis or vagina? With a lit candle inside, your blow-job pumpkin could be quite beautiful and set the perfect mood for this year’s Halloween party.
On the other hand, instead of carving something on your pumpkin, you could carve your pumpkin into something interesting, get creative, you could make a whole setup - like this lovely image of pumpkin tentacle sex.
Here is how to make it:
Step 1: Mark two concentric circles on the pumpkin
Trace around the base of your dildo, then make a circle around it at least one inch wider in diameter. In the center, mark a circle the diameter of your dildo.
Step 2: Make the lid
Cut out the center circle, then cut the outer circle at a shallow inward angle to form a "lid".
Step 3: Make room for the dildo
Insert the dildo into the hole in the lid, mark around the base on the underside, then use a spoon to scoop out the pumpkin flesh to make a niche for the dildo base to fit into.
Step 4: Check your fit
Make sure the dildo fits in flush with the pumpkin so the lid will sit properly.
Step 5: Place the dildo in the pumpkin
Fit the dildo into the lid and place on the pumpkin. Situate the pumpkin on the floor, a bed, or sturdy coffee table.
Step 6: Ride the orange pony
Go for it!
