If you are in, or are interested in being in, an online relationship, it is important to know what things to look out for so you don't get hurt -- physically or emotionally. You'll notice many people who can re-tale every horrible incident that happens in online relationships, rest assured you won't find that here. The advice you'll find below is meant for you to use as a way to help protect yourself from getting hurt. The tips are mostly common sense, but sometimes when it comes to love, it's good to have it written down for reference.
NOTE: Don't let your emotions get the best of you, because once you do, the Red Flags that are there, seem to be hidden.
Person is too secretive.
This can be as simple as the person is insecure with letting out information about themselves, to the person being married or living with someone else.
Person is too pushy to meet you in person.
I have a 3 week rule before I decide if I want to meet them or not. Why do I do this? Because I don't want to rush into things - we live in a digital age, that it is so easy to give your secret parts away in photos (you know, your n*ked photos) and that keeps the mystery away.
I am Salty Vixen, and yes I am a naughty Salty Vixen, especially when I write my oh-so-yummy erotica eBooks. In real life, I am human just like you and I. I have a rule I tell the potential suitors, "I ain't no hussy" it is an old term from decades ago, that means, I don't jump into the sack. I date to turn into a relationship and hopefully eventually marry. Sadly, most people just want to 'tap that' and move on.
I made the mistake of letting two men into my house after my 3 week rule. First guy, I dumped him because of his lack of communication and I knew he was on other dating sites talking to women (he had pictures of the women on his phone! The Tinder App notification popped up and he said "I thought I deleted all of these.." what a liar lol.
The second man dumped me because I am too busy of a person. Well, I am Salty Vixen, after all! I write and publish books but other than that I do have a normal adult life! That is good thing! The real reason why he dumped me is because I am not letting him tap me after the first few meetings. I don't mind kissing, but more than that, will have to wait!
With that said, the second guy was waaaayyyy too pushy for me to meet him and my emotions got the best of me and I let him into my life, big mistake. In all honestly I had no intention of meeting but he kept pushing to meet me! At the time, I just enjoyed the conversations and that is all I wanted them to be. So remember folks, if person is too pushy to meet you, STAY. AWAY. RED F*CKN FLAG!
Person is often flirting with other people online.
Just as in real life you can find "players" online. Watch how your online interest interacts with others. You'll learn more about them, as well as be able to spot any unusual interests.
Person wants too much information about you right away.
Unless you are 100% completely comfortable about this person, don't give away any personal information. Even then, it is a good idea to keep important information to yourself.
Person seems only interested in cyber or phone sex.
Unless this is something you are interested in, this relationship is probably not going very far.
After trust has been established, person will only give you a pager or cell phone number, but not a home number.
This again could just be precautionary, but again, it could indicate a cheating heart.
After enough time has developed, person is adamant about not meeting in person.
The reason for this could range from the person hiding something about their physical self, their lifestyle, other romantic involvement's, or just protecting themselves.
Person wants you to move to local area or in with them after only one or two meetings.
While my husband and I broke this rule, I strongly urge other couples to really get to know each other in person. It worked out well for me, but if follow this advice you will find yourself more confident about your choices if you really take the time to know them in person before deciding to make the big traveling step.
You find person posting other personal ads online.
An obvious heartbreak!
Person keeps e-mails and social media from other people hidden or a secret.
Something to keep an eye out for. Any relationship that begins or is involved in secrecy has it's days numbered.
Person asks for money or other help.
You may feel comfortable with this, but it's not a good idea, especially if your just met them. Don't open yourself to a potentially huge loss.
Person won't let your mail cards or other gifts to home address.
This is also another sign of a possible romantic interest living with them. Take the extra precautions to make sure your online interest is not already involved with someone.
Every tip is dependent upon your instincts. What is good for one person may not be good for the next. Use your head, and your instincts. If something doesn't feel right, question it and resolve it quickly. You may discover it was a silly case of doubt, but you may also discover it wasn't!
