Oh, the coveted endeavor of threesomes; they seem to linger as an improbable story that happened to some lucky friend. Throughout the years, we add mounds of detail to the three-pronged sexual fantasy, but few of us dare to share this secret proposition with the people required to transform such a deed from dream to graspable reality - these people being women (i.e actually grasping flesh). The truth is, there are a great many, plausible scenarios for threesomes, so long as you’re willing to take notice of the signs and step up. And if you can, you yourself will out-luck those two-ladied lovers so desperately envied by all.
1. Massive Parties
We’re talking - an overcrowded lawn of at least fifty people, music blared so loudly across the block that only gesticulating and smiling is necessary, beautiful bodied women indulging in booze and a mutual attitude of recklessness. Everyone should be sufficiently lubricated (liquor-wise...) as you position yourself near the young, single bunch. Start talking up (i.e soundlessly waving over the noise) two ladies, alternating equal attention to both. Keep it up, making sure they are connected not only to you, but to each other - try to get them flirting with each other, girls at parties often do. The more relaxed they become with three-sided banter, they closer they come to the three-sided bedroom.
2. Jacuzzis
Jacuzzis activate sensuality in all women (unless belted by chastity). The next time you find yourself beside the bubbly jet with a couple of females at a dispersed party, seize your chance. Sit yourself between the two of them, drawing them in with conversation (i.e subtly insinuating talk). Make it clear through flirtation that you’re attracted to both and not one in particular, otherwise the other prospect will forfeit. Splash around, throw jokes and make the jacuzzi your personal (three person) bathtub and by the time you’re brave enough to instigate, they’ll practically be expecting it.
3. Taking Advantage of a ‘Common Question’
For women, questioning their sexuality often happens later in life. If ever you’re comfortable enough to ask your girlfriend - “what do you think about the theory that everyone’s slightly bisexual?” or “do you think you could ever sleep with a woman?” - and she is comfortable enough to be unsure with you, offer up the possibility of a threesome. This can be done in a non-offensive way. Something like, “well, if you’re ever curious or interested, we could try something.” NOTE: This actually works.
4. Taking Advantage of Friend’s ‘Common Question’
All women have at least one female friend who randomly decided to start sleeping and/or living with another woman. If your girlfriend has one of these friends, and this friend is attractive (adventurous is a given), try to spark something of intrigue between this friend and your woman. Something as simple as the two of you inviting her over for dinner, drinking plentiful resources of wine and discussing the her recent bisexuality will open the door for wonderful opportunities.
5. Jumping on the Bandwagon - Two Lesbians
If you are acquainted with a female couple who attract your fancy and fancy your attraction, this is ideal. Though many lesbians are sincerely uninterested in heterosexual intercourse, they are often interested in wild sexual episodes. You could be a part of this. Begin by confiding your sexual questions and experiences, establishing the issue of sex as relaxed between you three, and then move toward nonchalantly inquiring about the possibility of an all-inclusive pajama party.
6. Friends On Vacation
Though two straight best friends definitely provide a scenario different from two seasoned lesbians, girls on vacation can unleash the craziest desire for sexual deviance. Might we say, more-so than two seasoned lesbians. When meeting two, (insert exotic ethnicity here) friends perusing the liquor selection at your local bar, offer to show them a good night on the town. Sheapard them around to your favorite places, treat them like your gorgeous, little princesses and end the night with the blitzed three of you bouncing around your pad (i.e. potential palace).
7. Skinny Dipping
Whether in a desolate, crevice-like lake or an expansive public beach, skinny dipping sets up a great situation for threesomes. The whole, wild atmosphere of excitement over nakedness will conjure in its participants an ability to relinquish formalities greater (for you) than clothing. Be confident, out there, flirtatious and fun-loving. The greatest appeal for women is not pressure, but self-preservation in precarious circumstances.
8. Intense, Sweaty Concerts
Concerts consisting of overwhelmingly powerful, upbeat music, beer kegs and barely an inch of space between bodies - are gold mines. Head up front to where all the die hards dance, and find the chicks bopping along, rubbing up against any and all (i.e girls and boys) who cross their path. Begin dancing with one, incorporate another and together they will end up incorporating you (?).
9. Making It Easier On Everyone - Pairing Up Your Prospects
You’ve begun seeing two different women simultaneously. They are both severely interested in you and you simply can’t pick. One finds out about the other. Instead of flipping a coin, mention to one - ‘If I could just have both of you together, once, then I’d stop seeing her.’ It’s risky, but we like risk. Risk reaps the most memorable of rewards. And, worst case scenario is that the one you propose the threesome to first leaves and makes your decision for you. There could be a very sexy flowchart for relationship decisions associated with this technique, we're thinking.
NOTE: If you are clever concerning this verbal approach, which means telling her while she’s turned on anyway, you might have yourself something a coin could never give you.
10. Posting To Non Creepy Classifieds
Obviously, we’re not talking about craigslist (Yes, craigslist is still around) here, because who knows what bear or boy might show up at your door instead of the women promised. However, there are many services and online classifieds which provide private forums wherein people post mild, sexual requests (by ‘mild’ we mean reasonable and not terrifying). If you have a difficult time penetrating the social reality of bringing two women together, this is a much more comfortable, practical option.
11. Befriending Strippers
NOTE: Not all strippers are sex-obsessed. In fact, some are quite the opposite. Some strippers, however, even when unpaid, love to make a boy’s dreams come true.
Meeting strippers is not difficult. If you frequent a certain club, have a certain cocktail waitress who brings your whiskey rocks and you do not grab her ass demeaningly or drop her tip in her tits, this will be easy for you. Strippers are human beings, too, even though to many of us they seem like superheros. So, there’s no need to act strangely or super masculine (actually, that would probably hurt more than help). Simply make friends with them as you would any hot girls who strike your interest. Once friendly with at least two (more the merrier?), begin by hanging out together, beyond the strip club and you’ve got yourself a threesome waiting to be ritualized by the actual threesome to come.
12. Pudding Wrestling
NOTE: We’ve seen this happen. It CAN happen.
At aforementioned ‘massive party,’ inflate a baby pool and fill it with pudding. Start a pudding wrestling match and arrange the order so that two girls end up in the ring against you (a la Oldschool). Getting sloppy down there, being dominated by two slippery girls, you’re destined to make something good of it. Offer to grab them a drink afterward and, together, ‘reminisce.’ Anyone who’s just wrestled you in a vat of pudding, is most likely willing to wrestling you and another woman elsewhere.
13. Riding The Rave
NOTE: This is only for those willing to go to a rave, duh.
In a room where all lights are lowered to buzzing, untraceable colors, people are stimulated by capsules which encourage cuddling, bizarrely entrancing music and lots of glow sticks pervade the scene, you’re bound to bed at least two women. Because the atmosphere so flawlessly encourages the most hidden of natural urges to emerge, you mostly like won’t even need to set the stage - just dive in dancing and don’t look back. Of course, you’ll first have to be the sort who’s willing to tolerate people expertly twirling sticks in their hands and touching the walls for texture. But thinking of the possible reward, the two extra, extra-hot bodies in your bed, we can’t really understand who isn’t .
