I am sure you are wondering "What is Dexting?" You have come to the right place to understand what dexting is and why it is the new trend and why we all do it in the. digital age of dating.
Urbn Dictionary defines Dexting as : Drunk texted. When you receive such a fucked up text, you KNOW it came from a drunk dialer.
This isn't what I am talking about. Yourtango.com claims a word that the author 'invented' - dating through text. I talk about this a lot on my podcast but the word 'dexting' isn't new at all. I have used it with my friends but this word needs to to viral.
We live in the dating digital world- 2023. Swipe left and swipe right. We text to get to know the person and sometimes texting does turn into sexting. I call it speed 'virtual' dating. It is true, dexting has replaced texting. This is when you and a person of the opposite sex (or same sex) decide there is some kind of cyber connection and you begin to text but never actually meet. HUH? You ask? Read on.
And if you don't like the person you are texting? Then block. Simple. I had a guy I was chatting for two weeks. He is in his 40s and he would send me pictures of food p*rn and he was constnatly partying. He had a good job. Made good money. The 'block' happened when he drunk texted me at 2:30AM saying he can't sleep so he goes to the bar to drink.
I have seen him on other dating apps. Still can't get into a relationship, I wonder why...buddy, it is time to settle down. Or last year, I went on a lunch date, after dexting a bit. He was rude and in middle of conversation, at least 3 or 4 times he looked at my boobs and said "nice rack" which is fine when you are dating but come on! that was too much. The following morning he sent me a d*c pic and later said "did I scare you?" - this man was in his 50s!- I said "women don't like dick pics. When we get them we show them to our other friends and compare how stupid dick picks are. Then we size up the dick picks we have and giggle because we are annoyed we got the dick pics. Although some I got over the years were kind of hot but NO DO NOT SEND ME DICK PICKS!
Whether or not you have successful text conversations will determine if you would like to meet. If the meet does happen, it either goes well, or somewhere in the middle of the date, you decide you are deleting that stupid dating app the second you walk in the door, or if you are a single parent like I am, when you are sitting in the carpool lane and delete it. If you are like me, I delete the app every 6 months.
WHY IS IT FUCKING HARD TO FIND SOMEONE NORMAL? Although I have found that divorced (and single) women in our 40s want to get married. For men? Many I have spoken with are "I got divorced. I don't want to marry but I want to fuck i.e. hookup". and since 98% women don't do hookups, they lie to the women they want a relationship to only take the women to lunch and pay for it, later expect oral sex (yes this happened to me! I declined it!) when the woman said in the profile AND on texts " I don't do hookups". Men, if a woman says no hookups, don't expect them. period.
So, what happens when you have that digital connection, but the meeting never happens? Days become weeks and weeks become months and you are still texting with this special someone but the face-to-face contact never actually happens. This, is the sole definition of"dexting." You are dating a person only through text messaging. (when you think about it, how many people have you had cyber relationships vs physical? - I bet it is a huge number...)
I am currently dexting someone. Would I call him boyfriend? no. But many women would say "after a month, that is a relationship" and yes it is but not the Boyfriend/Girlfriend status. I call it, flirty friends. We say "good morning/evening/night", we flirt throughout the day and also have deep meaningful conversations. Last night, he said to me "I hope we meet in person" I said soon. I do get nervous because finding time to meet is hard when you are an adult. Yes, one can make time but when there is jobs and family to support, makes finding time hard.
What if we meet in person and he doesn't like what he sees or I don't like what I see? Sadly, we live in a world where we judge. The more we chat the more I want to meet him in person but my end result, like many of us out there, I want a relationship that will eventually go into marriage.
