📖 37 mins read

Quality vs Quantity

You are so right about the benefit of trust in a safe relationship to sexual freedom and fulfilment. I am mostly a relationship type of guy and have not had a large number of partners. I have been amazed when ever I have became involved with a women who has has had many , many sexual partners even 10 times that of myself how to spite their notion of sexual freedom in the form of casual sex that they have actually little experience with truly great sex and further have had limited but repeated experiences. I think relying on the newness of different people whom you don’t particularly have an interest in emotionally leads most people to have selfish sex that would be pretty boring were they not turned on by the novelty of a new and strange partner. They always wonder how I know just what to do , just right and assume I’ve been around the block. The fact is that I have actually learned to please others and I’m simply paying attention and finding what they like not reciting a routine.
—joe3478

Given a favor

After trying to please my wife in intimate ways, she resists and only wants the missionary position. At the end, she says “That Good!” but her tone is “That Good that that is over”. I am starting to look outside for a partner whom I can have mutual sexual satisfaction with after a 10 year drought.
—Guest Frustrated

My husband and I can’t have sex, or good sex, unless both of us have just come out of a fresh shower. I know that sounds like a requirement, but some people don’t care if they’re clean, or smell good, etc… Without showeing before, I just can’t do it!
—SuzyScorp

My definition of bad sex would be, having sex with my partner and he is the only one having orgasms or complete pleasure from it. Foreplay is limited.
—Guest Married with children

This is such great stuff. For some reason I always like the ironic approach. I think it helps to point out to myself and others where we’re going wrong. Without the irony it’s easier to say I’m doing all those positive things when in fact you aren’t. With the irony maybe it’s easier to admit you do those negative things. If everyone could only read and take these points to heart the world would be a better place. Hell, if only my wife and I would take this to heart our world would be a better place. I’ll stop. I’d say I’m gushing.
—fredb001

This might be a topic for another article(s), but how would you educate children so that they will not grow up with these misconceptions about their own sex lives? Some of the points, like ignorance, can be addressed directly when the child is of a certain age. Other points, like comparing yourself to others, might involve parenting techniques that helps build the child confidence about their bodies. Yet other points, like sex is not special, I think, would require the parents to have a certain attitudes about sexuality in general. I have two young children (under 5). I think this is a good time for me to start thinking about how to educate them (in age appropriate ways) so that they will grow up to have healthy attitudes about sex. I’d like to know what your thoughts on this matter are. Thanks.
—Guest A Parent

I realize i have to give up enjoying sex, as my husband doesn’t care if i enjoy it. So i just do puzzles in my head, until he is done. So a partner who doesn’t care how you feel makes for the worst sex EVER!
—lafek

i don’t mean to sound rude but bad breath is the biggest turn off for me, i don’t want to do anything if his breath stinks.
—Guest junebug

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